Emerson, putting the threenager pedal to the metal these days.
Getting ready for bed tonight, he started throwing his water bottle in protest of having to put on pajamas.

I warned that I would take away the water bottle if he did not stop chucking it around. (It was full, and heavy, and the room is not that big, and his brother was rolling around on the floor without a helmet – not that I need a single reason). He threw it 2 more times in rapid succession, so I took it away. Poured out the water and put the bottle on an unreachable shelf in the bathroom.

He pouted, cried, begged, wheedled, demanded, cajoled, pleaded, and cried some more to get it back.

Please! (No.)
Please? (No.)
etc etc etc for like half an hour literally

Finally, he stood up and walked out of the room without a word. I assumed he was going to get a drink from his water cup in the kitchen…until I heard the clunk of an empty water bottle on the bathroom counter, and the water turning on, and the bottle filling up.

He’d gone to the kitchen, all right, but instead of drinking inferior cup water, he got a fresh water bottle from the drawer and filled it up himself.

I went to help him screw the top on tight. Wordlessly.

Because that’s what you do, right? When the universe has a laugh and gives you a kid just like you but with more energy and fewer inhibitions?

You give up. You pitch in. You take your half-victory, and he takes his.

You try not to think about velociraptors opening door knobs. Not tonight.

#xpost via Instagram


After nearly a month of stringing us along, the insurance guy decided to Total our van yesterday.

So instead of looking for a new family/wheelchair vehicle in 4+ years, as planned, we have about 48 hours. *pukes a rainbow*

We negotiated (pro tip: that’s what you call begging when you manage not to cry) with the body shop via the insurance guy to have them remove the wheelchair lift and the nice stereo we got installed last year. And they’ll reinstall the lift when we’re “ready,” which is objectively better than nothing. *pukes a rainbow*

Tomorrow we go clean the rest of our stuff out of the van and leave the factory radio and some other accessories. Going through the house, filling a laundry basket with headrests and headphones, manuals and key fobs, it looked like I was breaking up with somebody.

I guess – I never have done that. *pukes a rainbow*

Kk is going with me to look at a possible replacement tomorrow.
We’ll not be getting another van because none are high enough to clear our steep driveway without scraping.

Most cars can’t handle the tongue weight needed for the external lift, and I like buying cheap furniture too much to give up all cargo space.

A pickup would be too tall for the boys right now, though it’d be great for all our hardware store trips.

Compact SUVs are too small, and big ones are too expensive and too big.

That leaves midsize SUVs, which I’ve never owned before and only driven a couple of times. But I’ve mocked them plenty, so there’s that.

I think I feel about getting an SUV the way many ppl feel about getting a minivan. It’s a rolling concession, a deep bow to the familial and financial and physiological forces I could theoretically travel lighter without.

So much lighter.

But then who would I be traveling with? But then who would I be, traveling?

#xpost via Instagram



This is the coolest morning we’ve had since ever, so I made the family come out on the porch – before breakfast – just to FEEL IT.

Felix got it – he put on his boots and started up his lawnmower.😂 Emerson said something about “muffins,” but I just put my finger to his lips and whispered, “sshhhh…feeel the cooool, child. this is your birthright, october-baby”

My whole body hurts, but for a few hours, the windows are open and my soul is free.

#xpost via Instagram


Preschool open house was tonight, so the boys wore their new/bigger signature shoes to meet their teacher.
Blue for Felix, gray for Emerson, so everybody at school can tell them apart at a glance. I was thrilled to find these mostly-blue shoes with some pink highlights for Felix.🐩 Also thrilled when we found out they’ll have the same teacher as last year – she’s marvy.

One of the cutest thing since ever seen: some of their old classmates came up to say hi. Those friends are all advancing to the 3yo class because they are 3 now, but I know they’ll still see each other on the playground, in chapel, etc – it was nice to know they weren’t forgotten over the summer.

The family who sat behind us during the orientation also had twin boys (fraternal), about 20 months old, new to the school. The mom realized that she had checked us in at the airport when we flew to Germany almost 2 years ago!

I guess maybe she doesn’t meet lesbian moms with redheaded identical twins everyday!

She was pregnant with hers then, and we spoke briefly about it at the time. They’re also raising theirs bilingual (English/Arabic), and we’re probably going to do some playdates.

How crazy is that?! 🌎🌍🛫🌈
#xpost via Instagram


Taking out the trash and recycling tonight, @krismastree81 pointed out a wiggling skink beside our garage glue trap. When I put a stick down to shoo it away, we realized it was not a skink – it was a garter snake, and it was already definitely stuck.

Google told us to oil it free, so I grabbed the canola and doused it, then gently worked it free from the tail forward with a plastic spoon.

It was slow going at first, and the snake looked skeptical. (Fair enough, it was my first time, too.) But as soon as about an inch was off, snake started pulling more — and almost dragged the trap out of my hand! They are solid muscle.

We kept working together, adding more oil, and kk brought us paper towels to lay over the trap to it wouldn’t reattach itself with all its twisting.

Soon, it pulled free and slithered off along the foundation and curled up against the stoop to recuperate. I put out a shallow cup of water nearby and wished it well.

Some people think snakes are slimy, and they’re usually wrong. Tonight, however, there IS one very slimy snake in my neighborhood, and does it ever have a story to tell!

#herps #ThamnophisSirtalis #xpost via Instagram


There’s a lap under there, somewhere.
My stupid reflex reacto-feeling, when they start building a mom grotto on me, is to be annoyed, then claustrophobic. What if I want to stand up? So inconsiderate. Gawd.

When I’m lucky, my upstairs brain usually steps in and points out that they’re trusting me with their treasures.
Anointing me with their lovin’ plush.
Sharing their wealth without pausing to consider whether I deserve the honor.

That’s MY job. #disneyfamilyreunion #crayons #saturdayselfsermon #letthembelittle #limitedtimeoffer #xpost via Instagram


My garage shelves are 99% done! It has taken weeks (months?) of doing a few minutes at a time, but it is nearly done.
For about $150 in materials, 192 screws, 2 falls off the stepladder, and 1 bigass splinter, I’m getting 144 sqft of mighty functional storage space. Thanks for the inspo, @anawhitediy! #SuckItIKEA #screwedgluedandtattooed #homowner #shelfie #powertools #xpost

And yes, @carpenterkobydowns, I have whole new levels of appreciation for the hard work you do! 😵 via Instagram